??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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