sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
