Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize