she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I understand Curling. That high.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
