she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Randomize
