Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
