I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
