$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
