My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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