K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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