just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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