How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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