Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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