What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
