I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
