There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Randomize
