New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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