FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
my dad is drunk dialing our relatives who are stuck in a blizzard asking them to pick up sun tan lotion for him cause hes too drunk to drive to the store.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
ok first of all what the fuck
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
