Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
