that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
