Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize