Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I wish i was in the wii world.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
