Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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