We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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