so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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