doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
