Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
