Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
she told me i tasted like america
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
