Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
