I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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