he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
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