I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize