at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize