just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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