Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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