with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
