So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I'm jealous of your bromance
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
