She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
Walking down the street at 11 pm dressed in bubble wrap. Why is the bar so fucking far away??
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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