Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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