Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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