I hate your face
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
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