At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
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