you have to choose: penises or morals?
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
