even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
you didnt know i had herpes?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
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