Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
Randomize