and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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