I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
