i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
