Porn is love you can see.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Come over. I'll eat you out and we'll make bacon.
best text I've received ever.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
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