Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Randomize
