no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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