Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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